Wrestlemania 27 – A Review
And so, the dust settles on another Wrestlemania. Only one question really needs to be asked at this point: was it any good? Well, yes is my answer. Wrestlemania XXVII was a flawed but mostly very strong show for my money, which featured some good wrestling, some comedy of variable quality and a few surprises. With all that said, let me now look back at the show in order.
Things got off to a bad start when the news began to leak over the internet that the US Championship match between Sheamus and Daniel Bryan had been bumped from the main card and relegated to the status of “dark match” (for those of you not in the know, a dark match is a match that takes place before the cameras start rolling at a televised event – there’s usually at least one of these to warm up the crowd). This sadly appears to be becoming a familiar theme at Wrestlemania (witness the bumping of the Colons versus The Miz and John Morrison at Wrestlemania 25). I know that I was not alone in looking forward to this match, so for it to be cut was a disappointment. In any case, the match went to a none finish when the ringside lumberjacks got involved and the Raw General Manager ordered a Battle Royal to begin instead, eventually ending in a victory for The Great Khali.
Anyway, on with the show. Midnight (UK air-time) came and a singer I don’t know did a passable rendition of “America the Beautiful”. After that, we had our host, the most electrifying man in ALL of entertainment, The Rock! Rock proceeded to have fun interacting with the crowd but I felt that this segment dragged a little at home. It was eighteen minutes past midnight before we saw a wrestler (sorry, superstar) finally make his way to the ring! One can only imagine what Sheamus and Daniel Bryan were thinking. Surprisingly, it was Alberto Del Rio. The decision to start the show with the World Heavyweight Championship match was certainly an eyebrow-raiser. On the one hand, it did give a certain “let’s get started with a bang” vibe to the proceedings but at the same time it seemed somewhat unfair to relegate the winner of the Royal Rumble to curtain-jerker status. Having said that, I have heard wrestlers say that, if you can’t go on last, you want to go on first, so maybe Edge and Del Rio didn’t mind.
The match itself was very good, although undoubtedly too short. I felt that the finishing sequence was very well executed and the fact that Edge actually got the victory certainly surprised the crowd. Many fans seem upset with this decision but as I said in my predictions, waiting a little longer for the championship won’t do Del Rio any harm. Plus, the unpredictability of this outcome makes the whole show more enjoyable. The aftermath, in which Edge and Christian smashed Del Rio’s Rolls Royce was amusing enough, I suppose but didn’t really do it for me. They should have trashed the car more severely if they were going to, Stone Cold style. I must also say that Del Rio’s entrance was one of the most awesome wrestling entrances I have ever seen. Driving onto the ramp, with an image of his mansion on the screens behind him, it really looked as if he had driven straight out of his driveway and onto the stage. The set design and visual guys deserve whatever their equivalent of an Oscar is for this.
In fact, I’d just like to take a moment to congratulate WWE’s production team as a whole here, not just for Wrestlemania but for all of their work. WWE has the best camera crew, directors, sound guys, pyro and effects specialists, video editors and set designers in the business. The slick, glossy and professional nature of their productions is a major reason why nobody can compete with them and the men and women behind that do not get enough credit for it, in my opinion. At Wrestlemania they once again did themselves proud with a beautiful set-up. Nothing, however, would out-do Del Rio’s entrance, at least not in my opinion.
Back to the show. The next match was Cody Rhodes versus Rey Mysterio. In keeping with his usual tradition, Rey adopted a variation of a superhero costume on his way to the ring, this time coming out as Captain America. Which was awesome. I suppose if he ever tries to use Superman’s costume he’ll get sued by John Cena! The crowd took a little while to warm up to this match but warm up they did. Cody had a new entrance, focussing on his supposed “disfigurement” from the fateful 619 delivered by Rey back in January. The only thing that baffles me about this angle is that nobody, thus far, has simply pointed out that there is nothing wrong with Cody’s face! In any case the match got better as it went on and ended with a victory for Cody, meaning that one of my predictions had gone right.
Next up was the eight-man tag, pitting The Corre against Kane, The Big Show, Santino and Vladimir Kozlov. However, it transpired that the Corre had already assaulted Kozlov during Fan Axxess, so Kofi Kingston subbed in for him at the last minute. In all honesty, this match was purely about getting the guys on the card. All of the baby-faces got to hit one big spot before Big Show knocked Heath Slater out and Santino scored the pin-fall. It was all over in about ninety seconds. I had predicted a victory for The Corre here but again, I don’t see this as a major problem. I’m sure that they’ll soon be back to running roughshod over Smackdown again. However, I would point out that if WWE expect us to care about Heath Slater they are going to have to do better than simply having Michael Cole say “The One-Man Rock Band!” every time Slater tags into a match. How lazy is that? Oh, he’s got long hair; let’s call him the one-man rock band. Right now, Slater looks like a guy that will be wished well in his future endeavours about a nanosecond after The Corre breaks up. Ezekiel Jackson has size and power, Wade Barrett has had lots of mic time, even Justin Gabriel has a cool finishing move. What does Slater have? Long hair.
After three matches, therefore, we had seen two good matches and one throwaway bit of fun. It was time for things to be kicked up a notch and so they were with the fourth match, Randy Orton versus CM Punk. A great video package recapped the feud before the match, which went on to be one of the best of the night. The story of the match turned out to be Orton attempting to fight through the pain of his leg injury in order to deliver enough offence to Punk. Eventually, he succeeded with a beautiful spot, in which he caught Punk, attempting to deliver a flying clothesline off of the top rope, in the RKO. The two men pulled this potentially difficult manoeuvre off flawlessly and it looked awesome. Unfortunately, this left me one for three on predictions at this point, so I was really hoping that things would change soon. Some have complained that this match was too short but it went nearly fifteen minutes; that’s not terrible. Others have complained that Punk lost the match. I was also rooting for him but then, Wrestlemania is generally about the baby-faces.
Halfway through the matches and it was finally time for Jerry “The King” Lawler to get his hands on Michael Cole, in what has been one of the best-built angles in some time. Cole, dressed in a garish orange wrestling singlet (a nod to a former announce team colleague, perhaps?) came to the ring insulting Lawler and JR, who by now had arrived to do commentary. And there was much rejoicing. Early on, the match went well with Lawler getting the better of Cole’s coach, Jack Swagger, and beating the heck out of Cole in his own “Cole Mine”. Soon after, Swagger put Lawler in trouble and we began the phase of Cole’s dominance. While Michael Cole did some amusing spots, particularly his attempt at Swagger’s “Swagger Bomb”, this section of the match dragged on far too long. A “boring” chant began which, to his credit, Cole quickly paid attention to and finally Lawler got the upper hand again. Swagger got a Stunner, Cole got a whuppin’ and finally tapped out, Lawler and Stone Cold celebrated with beers that Lawler surreptitiously did not drink (being a teetotaller) and all was right with the world.
The match had gone on far too long (it was actually longer than Edge and Rey Mysterio’s matches) and, given the length of the celebration afterwards that was especially unforgivable but that was okay – Lawler had won. Except he hadn’t. After Stone Cold had given Booker T a friendly stunner, we got an email from the Anonymous Raw General Manager, informing us that due to Stone Cold’s involvement, Lawler had been disqualified and Cole was the winner. In a case of shooting the messenger, Stone Cold then stunned Josh Matthews. The upside of this was that this left us with the team of Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler on commentary for the rest of the show. The downside was that Cole had won and one of my banker bets had backfired. I was now one for four in the predictions!
After that, we had a long sequence of video packages, recapping Fan Axxess and various of the other events from Wrestlemania week. It really shows how far Wrestlemania has come over the years – and how worthwhile it is for a city to actually host the event. Then, the match we had all been waiting for. The match that surely should have been the main event. Triple H versus The Undertaker, No Holds Barred! Triple H came out first, preceding his standard entrance with an excerpt of Metallica’s “For Whom the Bell Tolls” and dropping the lights. The Undertaker’s entrance was awesome, as ever, though somewhat subdued by his Wrestlemania standards. Then, finally, the match began.
This was, as expected, a brutal affair. The first half of the match was a back and forth street fight in which the two traded big moves and went toe-to-toe. Highlights included Hunter’s vicious spine-buster through the Spanish announce table to the Deadman and a frankly evil-looking back body drop from the announce table to the floor delivered by The Undertaker. Eventually, the match slowed down and the second half of this battle saw Triple H gain the advantage and the action mostly take place in the ring. From hereon it was a case of Triple H dominating the match and attempting to do enough damage to his opponent to end it, while The Undertaker made sporadic and ever shorter but still dramatic fight-backs. However, no amount of big moves could quite get the three count for The Game. Finally, having already delivered three Pedigrees and countless chair shots, Triple H nailed The Undertaker with his own Tombstone Piledriver.
The Undertaker kicked out. Triple H backed across the ring, a look of actual fear on his face. It was as if, in that moment, Triple H suddenly believed the legend of the Deadman. Recovering his composure, Triple H went for his last signature weapon – the sledgehammer. Entering the ring with the hammer, Hunter advanced on his prone but stubborn opponent, only to get suddenly caught and dragged into The Undertaker’s deadly submission hold, Hell’s Gate! Hunter fought it for an incredible length of time, repeatedly trying to regain his hammer but the hold was locked in and he had no leverage to deliver a blow even if he could have maintained his grip. Finally, he tapped out. The match had lasted almost half an hour but it had told a great story. Triple H had brought more firepower than anyone had ever brought to The Undertaker but in the end the Deadman had preserved his streak, beating Triple H as much through sheer willpower as by any wrestling moves.
One last story was told after the match, as The Undertaker, in usual fashion, attempted to walk backstage under his own power rather than be helped or stretchered out. For once, he failed. He had won the battle and preserved his streak but at the end, The Undertaker was carried off while Triple H walked away from the fight. This was outstanding, everything I hoped for and I just hope that the two men get the credit that they deserve for it. The two men far exceeded their match at Wrestlemania 17, as good as that was and Triple H finally has that defining Wrestlemania match that his career has arguably been lacking. This was truly the story of an oft-used cliché, the Unstoppable Force meeting the Immovable Object. In the event, the Object remained unmoved but may have been irreparably damaged by the collision.
Following that was not going to be an easy task. There is no way that that match should not have closed the show and I began to worry that Vince had only gone with the running order he had because he wanted a feel-good moment to end the show. Did this mean that Cena was going to win? I hoped not but had no time to worry about it – Vickie Guerrero was on her way out with Wrestlemania-sized “Excuse Me”s! That meant that it was time for this year’s celebrity match, pitting Dolph Ziggler and LayCool against John Morrison, Trish Stratus and Jersey Shore star Snooki. This wasn’t too much of a wrestling match, as one would expect. The regulars all got to strut their stuff, the highlight being Morrison’s stunning version of Starship Pain to the outside. Finally, Snooki got the tag, with Michelle McCool trapped in the opposite corner.
A chorus of boos greeted Snooki as she entered the ring but she ignored them and then delivered a perfect double handspring into a butt bump on McCool. It was quite amazing. I’ve never heard grudging respect forced out of seventy-odd thousand people at once before. One moment there are all these boos, the next moment there’s some applause and you could almost hear thousands of people thinking “actually, that was pretty cool”. Snooki followed that with an odd but still quite cool cartwheel into a splash on the now prone McCool to pin her and win the match. All things considered, this was as good as one could have hoped. Wrestling fans may deplore the involvement of celebrities such as Snooki but the fact is that she got WWE an absolute ton of publicity, so one can’t blame them for hiring her. Plus, she seems to have got into the spirit of it and she didn’t stink up the joint. So I’d say this was a win for the company.
So, finally, the main event. John Cena versus The Miz for the WWE Championship. This began with an outstanding video package recapping The Miz’s rise to the top, going all the way back to his Real World and Million Dollar Tough Enough days. Some people have complained that WWE have frequently made The Miz look too weak during his WWE Championship run but they must have loved this. More than anything he has done so far, this said that The Miz is big-time. Unfortunately, WWE followed this with the low-point of the show. We had a choir come out and sing randomly, if well, before a video package started that basically could have been summed up as “John Cena sucks for Jesus”. I have never been a Cena hater but this was beyond crap. The saccharine treacly nature of this video package was just ridiculous and how anybody thought it would do anything other than even further incense the people that already disliked Cena is beyond me. The only theory that I could come up with was that Vince thought if he bored the audience for long enough they might cheer Cena out of sheer relief. In Atlanta, the buckle of the Bible Belt, seventy thousand people booed a choir! If that doesn’t say it all, I don’t know what does.
Finally, Cena actually came out, delivering his stupid marine salute and then making his way to the ring, somehow managing not to tell anybody to drink their milk or take their vitamins on the way. The match began. Unfortunately, for three reasons, it sucked big-time. Firstly, the crowd were largely burned out from Undertaker-Triple H. Secondly, the crowd also knew that nothing interesting would happen until The Rock came out, so that kept a lot of them sitting on their hands. Thirdly, John Cena was not at his best and The Miz, vastly improved as he is, is not yet a competent enough hand to cover that. Even Cena’s biggest detractors would agree that he is normally better than this. He seemed to lack energy, to the extent that JR and Lawler were forced to address it on commentary and speculate that something The Miz had done had had some kind of lasting effect.
In any case, the match ended with, of all things, a double count-out and frankly, I was fine with that, since it meant The Miz kept the championship. However, we were, of course, not done. With tedious inevitability The Rock came out and, after a little shenanigans with the Anonymous General Manager, announced that the match would be restarted with no count-outs and no disqualifications. I feared the worst as Cena went straight for the Attitude Adjuster. However, The Miz wriggled free and Cena turned around, straight into a Rock Bottom! One more time we heard JR calling “Rock Bottom! Rock Bottom!” and The Miz took advantage, covering Cena and retaining his title. After that The Rock battered The Miz and gave him the People’s Elbow, thus ensuring that a guy that left seven years ago had left two of the company’s top current stars lying but I didn’t mind. John Cena had not won the title! It left me three for five overall on my predictions but I really didn’t mind that. This story really has the potential to go somewhere now (more on that in my next blog) and the show, despite a major wobble in the last match, had managed to finish on a decent note after all.
All in all, I really enjoyed Wrestlemania XXVII. It was probably better than any of the last three Wrestlemania events, at least, and comparable to some of the best. I wouldn’t say it was the best of all time but it was a lot nearer to that than it was to being the worst. Oh, and one last thing. The world NEEDS to see William Regal on tour with Snoop Dog. Now.
Day of The Destroyer, Part Two
After the shocking appearance of The Destroyer on Raw, Smackdown was placed on high alert that week. Stephanie McMahon brought in extra security and locked the building up tighter than a drum. Every car coming into the arena was stopped, even Vince’s limo.
“Could I have your identification, sir?” asked the lead security guard, quite politely, although the team of black-suited men behind him made it quite plain that this was not a request. Vince’s answering smile held no trace of amusement.
“This is a joke, right?”
“Sir, I’m going to need to see some identification before I let you in,” responded the guard.
“I’m Vince McMahon, dammit! Everybody knows who I am! Now, let me in, before I have you fired!” Suiting his actions to his words, Vince began walking forwards. Immediately, the guards moved to block his path, determination etched on their faces. As the cameras returned to Michael Cole and Tazz at ringside, it was obvious that some sort of confrontation was in the offing.
Cole: “Well, it certainly seems as if Mr McMahon’s not having a good day!”
Tazz: “Hur hur! You can say that again. He’s serious, though, those guards are gonna be lookin’ for new jobs by the end of the night.”
Cole: “They’re just doing their jobs, Tazz. Folks, some of you at home may be wondering what all this security is about. We’re going to take you back to Raw this past Monday, where you’ll see the shocking arrival of the man they are simply calling The Destroyer.”
A recap then played of Monday’s events, before Smackdown got back to its usual business.
Later on, Vince, having apparently made his way past the security force at last, was in his daughter’s office.
“Stephanie, I appreciate the need for security but, quite frankly, I do not expect to have to identify myself at my own damn show!”
Stephanie’s reply was to the point. “Well, firstly Dad, Smackdown is MY show. That’s the decision you made when you made me General Manager. So, what can I do for you?”
Swallowing his anger, Vince continued. “Where’s The Undertaker? I want him with me until this Destroyer business is done with.”
“He’s not here. I haven’t seen him in a couple of weeks. I believe he’s gone looking for the Chosen One that the prophecy mentioned.”
Vince turned purple with rage for a moment and struggled to speak. Then, slowly, he regained his composure. “Ok, fine. If that’s the way he wants to play it, fine. I know he’s up to something. Chosen One! This is WWE, not Bessy the Vampire Slayer!”
“Buffy,” interrupted Stephanie, perhaps a little unwisely. “It’s Buffy the Vampire Slayer.”
“Whatever,” growled Vince. “My point is that it’s all BS. Still, like I say, if that’s the way he wants it, fine. Get me The Big Show. I need to talk to him.”
Next Monday’s Raw saw similar levels of security, although these guards were aware of who Vince McMahon was. In the ring, World Heavyweight Champion Goldberg was addressing the crowd.
Goldberg: “No Mercy is less than a week away and I still don’t know who I will be defending my World Heavyweight Championship against. Last week, Kane and Triple H had a number one contender’s match which ended in a no-contest. So, who is the number one contender? If Eric Bischoff were here, I might think this was a set-up, some way to try and put me in a Triple Threat match. Well, that’s just fine with me. I will take on anybody and everybody to defend my title. All I want to know now is, WHO’S NEXT?!”
At that we hear the familiar strains of “No Chance” and Vince McMahon comes to the arena, accompanied by his son, Shane.
Vince: “Firstly, Goldberg, let me assure you that nobody is trying to set you up here. Now, as it relates to the situation of who the number one contender is, quite frankly Triple H and Kane are in no condition to compete tonight, or Sunday at No Mercy. Therefore, in this very ring tonight, there will be an over-the-top rope Battle Royal. The winner will face you at No Mercy. And, just to make sure that there are no…unexpected occurrences this week, my son Shane and I will be at ringside, acting as referees.”
Later on, Shane questioned Vince backstage.
“Are you sure this is such a good idea? That guy took out Kane and Triple H pretty handily.”
“Relax! Nobody is getting in here tonight without my say so. No one could get past all my security guys.”
Shane still looked doubtful. “No one normal, maybe. What if this prophecy business is genuine, though?”
“Not you as well!” Vince could hardly believe his ears. “This whole prophecy thing is a bunch of bull. It’s just Undertaker trying to screw with me. This is just another attempt to destabilise my empire and it’s not going to work.”
“If you say so…”
Most of Raw seemed to go reasonably well. By the time the show was almost over, there were just four men left in the Battle Royal, Shawn Michaels, Chris Jericho, Christian and Mark Henry. The three smaller guys were all trying to gang up on Henry and force him over the top rope when, suddenly, the lights went out and the evil voice was heard once more.
“The Destroyer is here!”
When the lights came back up, The Destroyer was in the ring. Shawn Michaels and Chris Jericho were laid out at his feet, seemingly unconscious. Standing about 6’ 4”, The Destroyer cut an imposing figure. His arms looked like a cross between those of Batista and Brock Lesnar, while his costume gleamed like some form of black armour. Hoisting up the unconscious wrestlers, The Destroyer began shoving them over the top rope and out of the ring. Taking his chance, Christian delivered a clothesline to The Destroyer’s enormous back. Turning, The Destroyer snarled at Christian, who quickly stepped back behind The World’s Strongest Man.
The crowd gasped as Mark Henry faced this muscle-bound titan. The shocked McMahons began to climb on to the ring apron as The Destroyer and Henry collided, shoulder-to-shoulder. Neither man gave an inch. Henry charged again but, this time, The Destroyer neatly sidestepped him, before catching him with an arm-drag that sent him straight into Vince McMahon, knocking the billionaire to the floor. Christian leapt out of the ring and fled, while Shane went to check on his father. With everyone occupied, The Destroyer, to the shock of the audience, pressed Mark Henry above his head before dropping him a thud. At this point, Shane entered the ring with a chair and smacked The Destroyer firmly on his back. He might as well have hit an elephant with a fly swatter. The Destroyer turned to face him and delivered a right hand to the jaw that knocked Shane head over heels, leaving him unconscious. With no one left to face him, The Destroyer pushed Mark Henry over the top rope and let out a roar of triumph. With that, the lights went out again. In the darkness, the deep and eerie voice spoke once more.
“The gladiators fall. Their arena will be mine!”
The lights came back up. The Destroyer was gone, but the prone bodies of Vince McMahon, Shane, Shawn Michaels, Chris Jericho and Mark Henry lay scattered around the ring. Excitedly, Jonathan Coachman and Jerry Lawler debated what they had seen.
Coach: “What does this mean for No Mercy? Is The Destroyer the Number One Contender?”
Lawler: “Never mind No Mercy! What does this mean for Raw? Who’s going to stop this freak?”
The show went off the air with the two of them still arguing, as paramedics began tending to the wrestlers.
Looking at Next Year’s Opponent for The Undertaker
This is an old post. For my predictions regarding Undertaker at Wrestle Mania in 2013, click here.
While it may seem a bit early to be worrying about this just yet, one consequence of the Shawn Michaels – Undertaker confrontation at Wrestlemania 26 is a general sense of uncertainty as to who Undertaker’s next ‘Mania opponent could or should be. In the last decade the Undertaker’s streak has become one of the biggest drawing tools for Wrestlemania that WWE have in their locker but, after the outstanding matches and build-up that we have witnessed for the last two years it is almost impossible to see how they can possibly follow up. If Shawn couldn’t get it done, how are we expected to believe that anyone can possibly beat the streak?
Candidates for the match are already pretty thin on the ground. After Wrestlemania 25 people remarked that the only marquee stars left in WWE that ’Taker had not faced at Wrestlemania were Chris Jericho and John Cena. As yet, that situation has not changed. On the face of it, both men offer a fairly enticing prospect as opponents for the Deadman. Firstly, both men have had relatively little to do with Undertaker over the years. John Cena met ‘Taker at Judgment Day 2003, during Undertaker’s American Badass run but, since then, has only wrestled him in a handful of showpiece TV matches, and Jericho has never wrestled Undertaker at pay per view, so both matches would be pretty fresh, as would the feuds leading into the matches.
Looking at them individually, each has strengths and weaknesses as potential Wrestlemania match-ups. Without wishing to sound like a Cena-hater, one would have to say that, from a wrestling standpoint, Chris Jericho offers the better prospect. Jericho is versatile, talented, experienced and consistent and has wrestled pretty much every kind of match under the sun. Further, his relatively small stature would allow the classic big man-little man dynamic, should the wrestlers wish to employ it. Jericho’s exceptional verbal skills also mean that the promo aspect of the build-up would likely be extremely entertaining as well. The big problem, however, is that Jericho just would not be a credible threat to the streak. His Wrestlemania record is spotty, at best and, although undoubtedly a “top guy”, Jericho is not the kind of ultra-dominant wrestler who carries that threat of real danger with him. Critics would argue that he has put too many guys over to seem as big a threat to the streak as, say, Triple H or Batista did. Then again, the same argument could easily have been made for Shawn Michaels but he managed to convince the crowd for two years running that, just maybe, he might be the guy to do it, despite a ‘Mania record tilted heavily towards the loss column, and a recent history of putting guys over. So, maybe that’s not a killer issue.
John Cena, on the other hand, certainly would carry a credible threat. With an incredibly dominant Wrestlemania record, including more championship victories than anyone else in history, no one could dismiss him. Moreover, beyond kayfabe results, the fact that he is, and seems destined to remain for some time, the poster boy of the company would mean that everybody would have to take the possibility of a Cena victory seriously. As a match, I could see this being really exciting. Even their Judgment Day 2003 match, where Cena was a clear underdog and there was nothing in particular on the line, was highly entertaining – this could be something else altogether. The promos, on the other hand, fill me with dread. The thought of Cena spending weeks doing his “I can’t see how I’ll win but I’ll do my best” routine is not enticing but would almost certainly be the way that WWE would go. If Cena were to be arrogant, confident, cocky even, then that would be a different story. For some reason, WWE seem to think that Cena needs to be presented as a humble hero, when the record of Austin and The Rock should have proven long ago that the WWE audience prefer cocky heroes.
Of the two, on balance Cena seems to be the best option. Although Jericho might wrestle a better match, the fact that the outcome would be so much more uncertain with Cena would probably mean that his match would end up being more exciting. Are these our only options, though? It’s true that they’re the only big names yet to wrestle Undertaker at Wrestlemania but that surely doesn’t mean that they’re the only possible candidates. We have almost a year to go, after all. Might not someone else be ready by then? Sheamus, Drew McIntyre, The Miz and even John Morrison are all people who may have hit the heights by then. Of them all, I see Sheamus as being the most likely. If he continues in his present vein, by early next year he should have built up a formidable record as a dangerous opponent. Drew, I fear, may struggle a little now if the rumours about Vince retiring the “Mr McMahon” character are true. Hopefully, he is established enough now that he no longer needs that crutch. He is also still playing catch-up with regards to Sheamus who, as a former world champion feuding with Triple H, is clearly some way in front of McIntyre in storyline development. The Miz is an unpredictable possibility – if he continues to improve as he has for the last couple of years he may well be one of the top guys in the company soon but, like Jericho, he may not quite come off as a credible threat. Morrison needs a lot of work and, possibly a heel turn but certainly is another guy to watch.
Does Undertaker’s opponent have to be new to him? It’s another valid question that must be asked. A rematch with one of his former opponents might be just as satisfying. Triple H is an enticing possibility. He carries with him a permanent aura of danger and confidence, and would have the obvious storyline spur of “getting revenge for Shawn”. Moreover, as Kevin Eck pointed out in his recent blog on this subject (I heartily recommend Eck’s column, Ring Posts, which you can check out on the Baltimore Sun’s website – just follow my link) Wrestlemania 27 will be the tenth anniversary of Triple H’s first Wrestlemania clash with Undertaker, an awesome match in itself. Edge and Batista probably met Undertaker too recently at ‘Mania but a second clash with Randy Orton might have some possibilities. Orton is a totally different proposition nowadays, compared to where he was at Wrestlemania 21 when they first met, so I could go with that.
The Big Show is always a believable threat to anyone, of course but Undertaker-Big Show clashes have been done to death now and, given ‘Taker’s age and physical condition, he probably needs a more agile and athletic opponent these days. Similar logic probably rules out Kane, although there is still a core of fans that remain fascinated by the “brothers’” relationship. If next year’s ‘Mania is certain to be Undertaker’s last then, maybe Kane would be the right opponent. However, Kane would need a lot of rehabbing before such a match. I would think he would need to be extremely dominant from now on, probably even picking up a world title, if fans were to take the match seriously. Still, much like Stone Cold and The Rock, it would be rather nice if Kane was Undertaker’s last Wrestlemania opponent.
Another possibility is CM Punk. He has not faced ‘Taker at ‘Mania yet but he has, of course, recently feuded with him. Unfortunately, Punk was pretty much owned during that feud so, again, he would need to be built up somewhat before any potential clash. If the Straight Edge Society are still together next year then their presence may just throw a bit of doubt into the equation. Other than that, I don’t see any possibilities on the current roster. An SES break-up might lead to a push for Luke Gallows but I don’t see him reaching that level that quickly. Christian has the skills but not the credibility and Kofi Kingston would need serious pushing to be a genuine threat.
That leaves us to consider the possibility of someone from outside the current roster coming in for a match? Fans are mentioning two names frequently: Goldberg and Sting. Goldberg is known to be signing a merchandise deal with WWE at the moment. Wrestlemania 27 is in Atlanta, where Goldberg has just a little support! Although he does not admit to any particular desire to have another match, at the same time he has not ruled it out. He is also a likely candidate to go into the Hall of Fame next year. Still, I don’t see it myself. By then, Goldberg will be 44 years old himself and, assuming he doesn’t have a match between now and then, will not have had a pro wrestling match for about seven years – that’s a lot of rust. The “unbeatable” aura he once carried has eroded to a considerable extent and many of the current generation of WWE fans will not even remember his disappointing WWE run, much less his glory days back in WCW. Then again, we might have expected the same to be true of Bret Hart but the crowd still popped for him. Also, with Goldberg it would be too obvious that he was just wrestling “one more match” and, therefore, it is unlikely that anyone would really buy him as a possible winner. If Goldberg does wrestle at next year’s ‘Mania, it should be against some cocky young smart-mouth heel that he can spear, jackhammer and pin in short order to get a nice pop from the fans, create a feel-good ‘Mania moment and give himself a nicer farewell to the business.
Sting is another kettle of fish entirely. Ever since he donned the trench coat and adopted the Crow style face-paint fans have tended to see him as WCW’s answer to The Undertaker. Despite his age he is still in good shape and works to a high standard. His status within the business is also truly legendary. The problem of recognition amongst the current WWE audience remains, however, as does the fact that he is approaching retirement. Like Goldberg, it would probably be an obvious one-off appearance, so the outcome would be all too predictable. Also, in both men’s cases one has to question whether or not they would be willing to do the weeks or even months of TV build-up and promotion that WWE would want for such a match. Moreover, Sting has never once even hinted at any desire to go to WWE and seems perfectly happy in TNA at the moment. Finally, even if he leaves TNA and decides he wants to go to WWE, there is no guarantee that they would put him on the ‘Mania bill. WWE give Wrestlemania spots to people because they think they will draw, not because they deserve it. Otherwise Jerry Lawler would have been booked on a Wrestlemania card years ago. I don’t see Goldberg-Undertaker happening but I see even less likelihood of Sting-Undertaker.
So, after all that we are still left with John Cena as the likeliest opponent and WWE may well go that way, though many speculate that an interim opponent will be found next year and Cena will be saved for the one after, the twentieth Wrestlemania match of The Undertaker and an obvious round number to finish his career with. There is yet, however, another possibility which I would advocate as utterly changing the dynamic. Simply put, why not book Undertaker in a tag team match? This would give a whole new angle to the situation as, for the first time, Undertaker’s streak would not be entirely in his own hands. WWE would be able to play up the possibility that ‘Taker’s partner might be pinned and thereby cost him the streak. The obvious partner would be Kane and he has enough “tweener” mystique to muddy the waters even further, by hinting in promos that he might actually want to lose just to cost his “brother” the streak. A tag match, with a partner of dubious loyalty would be a whole new spin on the streak and could breathe life into it.
Moreover, if next year did turn out to be Undertaker’s last hurrah, then what better way to go out than teaming with his storyline brother? Of course, their opponents would need to be carefully chosen. If it had been this year, I would have said D-Generation X would have been perfect for the job. However, I would like to see the team of ShowMiz, The Big Show and The Miz kept together and remain champions all the way through to next year’s Wrestlemania for the purpose. By then they would be established as a fantastically dominant team and The Miz is young enough and athletic enough that he could do the majority of bumping to keep the match going at a fast pace despite the more advanced ages and huge size of the other participants.
Another possibility would be for The Undertaker to take on a “dark apprentice”, a character that could maintain the “occult” gimmick after Undertaker himself calls it a day. This would give another young wrestler the rub and allow WWE to use the match to help create a new star while, at the same time, casting doubt on the outcome through the device of the opponents targeting the inexperience of Undertaker’s partner. This would, of course, be dependent on finding a young talent with the necessary aura and charisma to take on the role convincingly. Perhaps a young man like NWA star Mikael Judas might fit the bill. This would, however, be similar to what WWE tried to do in 2003 with Nathan Jones, only for Jones to prove unsuited for the role so they may well be leery of trying it again.
In conclusion, then, my preferred option for The Undertaker would be to see him team with Kane against an incredibly dominant ShowMiz at Wrestlemania 27. The only problem with that is that it would prevent The Hart Dynasty from winning the tag titles in the meantime (unless they won them then dropped them back to ShowMiz during the year) but, given the youth of the Harts, I don’t think this is a major problem. This match would be a genuinely less predictable contest and would also achieve the bonus of giving Kane something worthwhile to do at next year’s event, rather than merely making up the numbers in the Money in the Bank ladder match.
Welcome to Wrassle-Mania! A Look Back at Wrestlemania 26
After such an impressive build-up, it seems hard to believe that Wrestlemania 26 has come and gone. WWE are, of course, fond of exaggeration and hyperbole but, in this case, many of their assertions going in to the event were on the money. This was undoubtedly one of the most hotly anticipated ‘Manias that I can remember, and the rematch between Shawn Michaels and the Undertaker was certainly the most hotly anticipated Wrestlemania match that I can remember. The question was, would it all live up to the hype and expectation? Spoilers follow throughout as I attempt to give my own answer to that question so, if you haven’t yet watched the show and are planning to, I advise you to stop reading now.
The show kicked off with the usual patriotic montage as guest Fantasia sang the national anthem. The stadium looked absolutely amazing, with an enormous stage set-up, huge ramp to the ring and a great deal of pyro. WWE are expected, by virtue of being the biggest and richest wrestling promotion, to have the best production values in wrestling but, in fairness I still don’t think that they always get the credit they deserve. Critics should not underestimate the role this plays in WWE’s dominance of the industry; if TNA could match these production values it would vastly improve their ratings in my opinion, simply because many fans would immediately take the promotion more seriously.
So, after the usual impressive victory package it was on to the first match, the Unified Tag Team Championship match pitting R-Truth and John Morrison against ShowMiz. While this may not have really been one of the feature attractions, I was nevertheless somewhat disappointed by the brevity of this match. The challengers showed a few of their nice moves and then, before you knew it, Morrison was lying flat on his back. Having said that, the result does not displease me in the least, as I had no particular desire to see Morrison and Truth remain a team, while ShowMiz are great value and should stay together for a long time yet. The tag match was followed by the triple threat match between Randy Orton and his two former Legacy stooges, Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase. Frankly, it made sense to get this one out of the way early as well, since the majority of fans had seemed under whelmed by the build to this. The match itself was executed well enough but suffered due to the fact that is was so painfully predictable: Orton fought bravely until the numbers caught up with him, then the two beat him down for a while, until miscommunications caused them to start fighting each other, allowing Orton to get the win. Tired, all too often repeated formula that just goes to show that sometimes, doing what makes sense isn’t always the smart thing to do. On the plus side, Orton was massively over with audience, who just loved everything he did. A good crowd can lift a mediocre match sometimes and that’s what happened here.
So, it wouldn’t be WWE without some shameless shilling and tedious attempts at humour so, following the triple threat we got a bit of both. After the usual unnecessary singing from Jillian Hall (and how on earth is that gimmick still going?) Santino Marella informed us that anything could happen when you bite into a Slim Jim. Upon biting into his, Jillian transformed into Mae Young who proceeded to snog the unfortunate cobra, before another bite replaced her with Gene Okerlund. Finally, Melina replaced Gene and the pair walked off screen, ending this pointless segment. Now, as much as I pop for anything that gets Mean Gene on the screen, I am sick and tired of Mae Young snogging guys a third of her age. For goodness’ sake Vince, get it through your head, it’s NOT FUNNY ANYMORE! IT NEVER WAS!
Thankfully we had wrestling again after that, in the form of the Ten Man Money in the Bank Ladder Match. These matches don’t really need any kind of review, do they? We saw lots of crazy spots, some of which clearly didn’t come off quite the way they were supposed to, and some exciting moments as people almost got the brief case. Michael Cole managed to call a Twist of Fate when Christian actually hit an inverted DDT off of the ladder on Matt Hardy, which, once again, seemingly had every smark on the net calling for his head. Yeah, because Jim Ross never called a move wrong, did he? It’s the heat of the moment guys, nobody’s perfect. To be fair to Cole, Hardy was trying to hit the Twist of Fate at the time. In any case, I was extremely pleased when Jack Swagger won the match. I am happy to say that I was nowhere near calling this and never would have but then, I never thought CM Punk had a chance of winning MITB the first time he did, either. Hopefully, Swagger will seize this chance to step up to the next level.
After a quick look back at the Hall of Fame from the previous night, it was on to Triple H and Sheamus. I had originally called Sheamus to win this one but, looking back at Hunter’s Wrestlemania record, I began to have my doubts, rightly so as it transpired. Win or lose didn’t really matter in the end, as this was by far Sheamus’ best match thus far in WWE. A lot of credit must go to Hunter for selling Sheamus as a real threat. There were a couple of near falls that were actually hard to call, the crowd were seriously into Triple H and, when all was said and done, this was the best match to this point on the card. Absolutely awesome video package to recap the feud before the match, as well.
Another impressive video package followed, refreshing our memories of the excellent CM Punk-Rey Mysterio feud. I must say, I never thought that there was any possibility that Mysterio would lose this and be forced to join the Straight Edge Society, as it seemed to me that that would absolutely kill his character but, even so, this was a fun match, if a little short. There were some excellent sequences in this match, including a truly outstanding DDT counter by Mysterio, and the finish was a work of art. The last year has been outstanding for Mysterio, particularly the feuds with Jericho and Punk, while CM Punk himself can seemingly do no wrong. Everything the man does is awesome.
Twelve years in the making! Bret Hart finally gets his hands on Vince McMahon. We all knew what this was – a feel good moment in which Bret would get revenge. Two things were guaranteed to happen in this match: Vince would get screwed in some way, and then he would tap out in the sharpshooter. In that sense, the audience were not disappointed. However, this was another example of that strange situation where doing what makes sense doesn’t actually work. This was just a beat-down, pure and simple and, as such, it went on for way too long and got boring. Then again, why would Bret finish this quickly? Why wouldn’t he torture Vince? It made sense within the confines of the story but it didn’t make for good entertainment.
We had reached the business end of the show now, a fact further illustrated by the fact that the next match up was the World Heavyweight Championship match between Edge and Chris Jericho. Maybe it was just the TV but Edge did not seem particularly over here, while the Chris Jericho fan club were definitely front and centre! It seems as if Edge’s face run is already losing steam. The match itself was very good, and the longest to that point but fell short of being a classic. However, I was glad to be on the money in predicting a Jericho victory, since his championship reign deserves to continue. After the match, Edge hit Jericho with an awesome spear off the announce tables but the majority of the crowd actually seemed to boo this. This is the third time, as far as I recollect, that Edge has been pushed as a main-event babyface and it has never worked. Perhaps it’s time for WWE to simply accept that the guy is a natural heel.
By this point of the show I was feeling pretty happy as a viewer. Although nothing had jumped out at me as a must-see classic, I had spent the entire show anticipating something big coming up so, since nothing had really annoyed me (Mae Young and Jillian Hall aside) I was by no means disappointed. Unfortunately, I was just about to be. Next up was the ten Diva tag team match, which gave us the enticing prospect of Vickie Guerrero in action. Yes, I just typed that with a straight face. Never play poker against me! The match was actually okay, clearly intended to be short and allowing each of the women to hit her finisher in a sequence that was actually quite amusing, despite how ludicrously contrived it was. Unfortunately, at the end of all that we were treated to the sight of Vickie giving her “bullfrog splash”, messing it up completely and managing to make a mess of the cover as well. Moreover, what the heck is she doing getting a victory at WRESTLE-EFFING-MANIA?! Vickie is an absolute heat magnet and I think that she does a great job for WWE but at Mania she should be embarrassed and run out of the arena.
Ah well, thankfully there was a proper wrestling match to follow that in the form of Batista versus John Cena. Plenty of boo boys in attendance for Mr Cena, as usual but the main thing is that the crowd were totally engaged by this match, which as a result, was excellent. I wasn’t too enamoured by the decision to have Batista tap out but since he has made Cena his personal you know what for the last couple of months I suppose Cena needed as decisive a victory as possible. Incidentally, this victory made John Cena the most successful submission wrestler in Wrestlemania history, as he became the first man ever to win three Mania matches by submission. This was undoubtedly the best match of the card. At least, until….
The Main Event! The rematch between the Undertaker and Shawn Michaels was the most anticipated match in Wrestlemania history, so they said, and I won’t argue. Did it live up to last year? Absolutely. Was it a better match? Hard to say. The point is that this match was emotionally stronger than last year’s because almost no one wanted either man to lose. Debate had raged over this one but I never wavered in my conviction that The Streak would endure. I tell a lie, that was my call but I was really uncertain for much of the match because the near falls were just too hard to call! However, when the final moments came, with their deliberate evocation of the end of Michaels-Flair two years ago, it became suddenly clear. Like Michaels, Taker didn’t want to retire his noble adversary. Like Flair, Michaels wanted no sympathy and demanded Taker’s best shot. And, with a tombstone and a three-count, it was over. Simply spine-tingling.
And so, is this really the end for Shawn? I can’t say for sure. I’m not naive enough to take a wrestling retirement as gospel but on the other hand, it does seem to me that WWE wanted this to mean something. Would it still matter if Shawn ends up back in the ring in August? That’s for each of us to answer for ourselves. I will say this much, however: those people who keep suggesting Shawn will follow Flair to TNA are, I think, sorely mistaken! I would be very surprised indeed if Shawn ever wrestles again outside of a WWE ring.
So, looking at the show overall, Wrestlemania 26 came in with massive momentum from what was widely agreed to be one of the strongest pay per view builds in recent WWE history. The show itself, however, rarely hit the heights. That said, it was also, with the exception of a bad comedy skit and a terrible finish to the Divas match, never less than solidly entertaining. The show was also wisely structured and built up to a superb finale. Last year, I gave Wrestlemania 25 a grudging 8 out of 10 almost entirely on the strength of the HBK-Taker match. This year, it’s an easy and well-deserved 8.5 out of 10, which I might well kick up to a 9…. purely on the strength of the HBK-Taker match.
Thanks for the memories, Shawn!
Thoughts on Raw and Destination X
To the fans chanting “you can’t wrestle” at John Cena (during a promo) on Raw this week: get over it. Please. They’re not going to fire him. They’re not going to push him down the card. They’re probably not even going to turn him heel. They’re certainly not going to acknowledge your chants. So, if you don’t like Cena please, please just stop watching his segments, quit it with the inane chanting and quit ruining it for the rest of us!
Bret Hart’s promo on Raw went on too long and the crowd seemed to get a bit restless. Given that he didn’t actually have anything new to say, this segment should have been shorter. Really liked the way he finished, though.
Enjoyed the Pete Rose-Kane interaction. Takes me back! Also enjoyed the Kane-HBK match and the interference by Undertaker.
Finally, Kofi is added to Money in the Bank! About time, too. Did ANYONE think Koslov actually stood a chance of qualifying?
Enjoyed Ted and Cody’s little digs at each other. That handicap match was a very well put together segment.
All in all, another strong Raw as we build to Wrestlemania…on Sunday!
As usual, I enjoyed TNA’s latest pay per view offering. Destination X had some great matches but none more than Generation Me versus The Motor City Machine Guns in Ultimate X. The speed and fluidity with which Gen Me work is breathtaking and, while their high-spot filled offence may not be every wrestling fan’s preferred style of wrestling, one has to admit that they are taking it to new levels.
Rob Terry’s match with Magnus was booked sensibly to allow Terry to shine without putting too much pressure on him. Speaking of the British Invasion, Doug Williams had a very strong outing with Shannon Moore. I like the fact that Kazarian has regained his spot at no.1 contender but Moore still has a beef with the champ. The way TNA position multiple potential challengers to their title-holders helps keep the show interesting and unpredictable.
Loved the finish to Abyss-Styles. Sure, we all prefer clean finishes at pay per views but there’s no law that says every main event has to end in a clean finish. Once again, we now have a champ facing several deserving contenders. Abyss has been built up even stronger without hurting the champ. The main thing is that Abyss left Destination X more popular than when he entered it, at least as far as I could tell by listening to the crowd.
Revised ‘Mania predictions:
Still with Cena over Batista.
‘Taker over Michaels.
Edge over Jericho (but harder to call).
Bret over Vince with the Sharpshooter.
Sheamus over Triple H (big call, I know).
Rey Mysterio over CM Punk (think this is a no-brainer).
Randy Orton to win triple threat against Legacy (though I won’t be totally surprised if not).
Still can’t pick a Money in the Bank winner: say, one from McIntyre, Kingston, Christian or, just maybe, MVP.
ShowMiz to retain tag titles.
Marshall Law 